Hey there I’m back. It’s been a while since I last wrote. I meant to write sooner but it’s been kind of hectic. I finally checked out that church Christina told me about. It is very beautiful and very connected. It was exactly what I was looking for. I’m going to try to go to Sunday morning mass tomorrow. I’m really hoping this is what I’m looking for. Its funny how unexpected it was for me to look for a new church. My dad asked me the other day where I had gone so early in the morning and when I told him I had gone to church, he just looked at me funny and said ok.
Moving on, it has been such an adjustment now that I’m done with school. The transition has definitely been a lot harder that I anticipated. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think it was going to be a walk in the part but I don’t know I guess I was just expecting it to be different, easier even. The first couple of months it was very exciting. The concept of being done with school was amazing ! I mean i love school and i love learning new things but i mean come on. who wants to always be pressured to turn things in at a specific time. i sure don’t. it was great to be able to read any book i wanted instead of reading something because i had to,, but truth be told now that I’m done and more than half a year has passed, i truly miss it. Funny thing is that I don’t know if i want to necessarily pursue getting a masters. At this point all I want is to get a better job.
My priorities have definitely changed. While i was still in school, I really wanted to get my BA then my MA then eventually my PhD. But the more I think about it the less i want that. I want to find a 45K or better job right now with benefits. I want to save up money and move out. I want to find that special someone and get married. I want to travel with my husband and then settle down. I want to buy a house not in a big city outside of California and have kids. I want a house full of noise made buy happy kids, barking dogs and love. I want a simple and happy life.
Will I eventually go back to school ? I don’t know. There are days when I wish with all my might that I was back in school. There are other days, however, where I am absolutely happy with the decision i made. And its not so much as because I’m lazy and don’t want to do the work. But mainly I want to live my life! I want to explode the world ! I want to get to know different people and make new friends. I want to develop new hobbies and start running ! Catch up on all the books I’ve always wanted to read watch all of the movies and shows i missed because of school. I like drinking wine and relaxing and not have to worry about assignments.
Anyway, am I happy with life right now? i think i am. do i have doubts about the future? well sure doesn’t everyone? I just hope that at the end of the day i made the right decisions for ME. I’m sure i will land a better job soon (positive thinking here) I’m sure i will get my own place soon enough. I’m sure everything will work out. it has to right !?
~the real journey begins